a thought ...

I read this last night somewhere and it hasn't left my mind ... It is so true of how I feel.

Before you were conceived I wanted you.
Before you were born I loved you.
Before you were a minute old, I would have died for you.

I think that says it all ...

We have a tooth!!!

Yesterday evening, I was playing with Sage before leaving to go to Bill and Cheryl's and I thought I saw a little bit of white beneath Sage's gums. I was trying to get her ready to go, so I didn't have time to investigate. On the way over, I was playing with her in the backseat and noticed it again when she laughed. So, I stuck my finger in there, much to her dismay, and felt around. She had a tooth break through on the bottom right yesterday. It's so cute. I keep wanting to look at it and making her mad. She doesn't like it when anyone messes with the front of her face around her mouth or nose. And while she is all about putting YOUR finger in HER mouth, how dare you try to do it yourself. Nope ... your finger goes into her mouth on her terms. So, as much as I hate annoying her with needless things, I did find myself grabbing her little chin a few times and trying to peek in her mouth. You can see it pretty good when she laughs because she opens her mouth wide, but it's only a flash and then it's gone. I can't wait until it's up far enough to get a picture. Maybe I can get a picture of her laughing tonight and enlarge only the mouth portion and see the tooth. Who would have thought, my new obsession is a tiny little tooth that I only get fleeting glimpses of!!!

I'm slacking ...

Yes, I know ... I'm a slacker. I haven't updated the page in too long. My Durango was wrecked last weekend, it's done for. The insurance company is sending it to the auction yard and I'm waiting to hear about the payoff. While I am in limbo, I'm driving a Jeep Grand Cherokee and I don't like it at all. The guy at the rental place tried to give me a little Nissan Sentra and there was no way I was going to drive Sage around in that, so the best thing I could get was the Cherokee. I miss my truck.

Sage is becoming quite the wiggle worm. She'll buck her little butt right out of your lap if you aren't paying attention and holding on tight. I got her an exersaucer from Baby Einstein on Saturday and she has become her new best friend. She sat in it talking to herself in the mirror for about 15 minutes this morning. She was hilarious. She is starting to like playing on her gymini a lot more now as well and can play on her own for extended periods of time without getting upset if she can't see you.

We went to Pete's sisters house yesterday, Debi, for his nephews graduation party. They hadn't seen Sage yet and she was her typical smiling self. She got to meet her Aunt Debi, Timmy, Cheyenne, Josh, Mikayla and Aunt Mary and Uncle Scott. Being outside in the fresh air wore her out and she was asleep by slightly after 8:00 last night. She did really well on the ride down and back. She didn't fuss at all. She seems to be getting used to riding in the car seat now, which is good. Now I can actually go places and not have to worry about her screaming her head off because she's strapped in!

Kissy face ...








... and with Aunt Debi

5 months olds!

My little monkey is 5 months old today and I still can't quite believe that she's here with me. It is amazing how such a tiny little person can change your life and your goals. Her Grandpa came by today and gave her a new toy. Instead of a jack-in-the-box, it's a bunny-in-the-box. He thought it would scare her but when it popped out she got really excited and reached for it. You got it ...she wanted to put it in her mouth!!! So, a few minutes later that is exactly where it was. Here is a picture of her from this morning before she went to the babysitter for the day.

It's all about the FEET!

Miss Sage is just fascinated with her feet. She constantly grabs them now and is earnestly trying to get them in her mouth. She rolled over for the first time today and I missed it! Phyllis put her to sleep on her back and the next thing she knew, she went to the crib to check on her and she was on her stomach ... sound asleep. I hate that I missed it. I've been playing with her on the floor and giving her things to try to get her to roll over and she doesn't go any further than her side!!! I guess this is just the first of the firsts that I will miss by not being a stay-at-home mom. Sucks!

Here's a picture of her playing with the toes yesterday ...

The Kissing Monster strikes

I didn't have my camera ready and was busy in the kitchen, so I didn't get any pictures ... Sage has started demanding kisses! Pete was holding her and had her sitting on the edge of the couch while Kaylie was on the floor talking to her. Kaylie decided to lean forward and give her a hug which Sage thought was going to be a kiss. She opened her mouth wide and didn't get a kiss ... her reaction was to start yelling/growling, kicking her feet, waving her arms and making a general spectacle of herself. So, Pete had Kaylie do it again and Sage repeated her antics. Every time Kaylie started to lean toward her or would get close enough, Sage would grab her shirt or cheeks, pull her toward her open mouth and growl at her. She had everyone in hysterics! This went on for about 5 minutes before she finally got tired of it. I'm going to have to see if I can prompt her to do it again one evening when I am able to take pictures. It is SO cute!!!

Weekend

Wow, I really suck at this, don't I? I think about it, I plan, I get distracted! This weekend was hectic to start out and then pretty subdued by the end. Friday evening, I finally got out Sage's little ducky "pool" for her to play with. It's a blow-up ring that has a chamber in the center to fill with water. She didn't really know what to make of it and kept wanting to lick it. I got some cute pictures which I will add to this posting this evening.

After feeding Sage on Saturday morning, I took her and Kaylie to CostCo with me. When we got there, I popped Sage's little tushie into the baby bjorn and off we went ... and I spent the next 45 minutes getting pummelled in the thighs by tiny little feet. One woman actually stopped because she was laughing at her so hard. She had her little arms and legs going as fast as she could. By the time I got through the check out and got everything in the truck to head home, Sage had had enough. She was tired and hungry. I had to feed her as soon as we got home and she quickly fell alseep. Mom called right after Sage had fallen asleep and wanted to see her, so I took her up around noon. Worked out great ... gave me an excuse to be going back around 4:00pm and Mom still didn't know we had planned a surprise dinner for her that afternoon. Sage and I got home around 8:00 and she fell asleep not too much later.

Yesterday ... Mother's Day ... was not so out of the ordinary. Sage did allow me to get a little extra sleep. She got up at 4:00 and had a bottle, but was back asleep by 4:30am. Woke up again at 7:30am for another bottle and went back to sleep again! Yay ... Next thing I knew, I was waking up to little hands touching my face and the little monkey was laughing. I think she woke me up to just so I could see her new discovery ... her FEET. She won't leave them alone now. It's hilarious. She and I spent the day hanging out together and not doing much of anything.

She normally wears her sleepers on the weekend and this morning when I changed her and put a little pants outfit on her she looked down and was amazed by what she saw. Her mouth was open wide, she let out this excited sigh and instantly reached for her toes. She seems to be particularly fond of the big toe on her right foot. She keeps bringing that chunky little leg up as high as she can and grabbing her toe. I'm guessing that pudgy little digit will be in her mouth by the end of the week since everything else she grabs is fodder for her gums! On Saturday, she chewed on both mine and Mom's thumbs and Aunt Kathie's arm. I'm not sure if anyone else was subjected to her constant need to explore everything with her mouth and leave a trail of a baby drool a mile long.

American Idol??? America is stupid!

Okay, it took me 5 years to get sucked into this show, but they managed to do so this year when I saw some of the singers they had on the show. My first disappointment was when Mandisa was voted off so early in the competition while that flake "oh pity me" Kelly Pickler actually hung around until a couple of weeks ago! I mean give me a break ... how long can being a blonde bimbo get you by? By American Idol standards, and the American people voting, apparently a good long time. All of the preliminary auditions and SEVEN weeks of actual real competition. The girl has a mediocre voice, at best, and never should have made it as far as she did.

Last night ruined the show for me. Yeah, I like looking at Chris ... who doesn't? But that's not why I watched. I love the guys voice. Katherine has a really good voice ... she has training since her mom is a voice coach. But gimme a break! She blew it on Tuesday night and there is no way she should have made it to next week's semi-finals. She screeched through part of her songs, she forgot the words and admitted it, she can't dance ... shall I go on?

I read somewhere that Fuel is very interested in him after covering one of their songs early in the competition. Maybe they'll be giving him a call soon. He's definitely going somewhere ... fortunately, now he won't be held back by American Idol.

Yeah, I know, I didn't post last night ...

I really did plan to post last night, but again, life got in the way. I took Cody to his baseball game last night and Pete stayed home with Sage. They lost, 2-4, to the Orioles ... again. That team is good. Kind of sucks, but they have beat them once.

I'm not feeling well, at all, today and have decided to take a sick day. I got sick twice within an hour of waking this morning. And little miss Sage decided to get up at 5:00 a.m., rather than her normal 6:00 a.m., so I was scrambling back and forth between her and the bathroom. I did manage to get her fed and changed without getting too ill! I took her to Phyllis' as usual and will go get her early this afternoon. I can't be home all day without having my little monkey here with me at least part of the day. I just hope I stop running to the bathroom so that I can get her sooner, rather than later.

A friend on our Motherstone list, Beth, had her baby on Monday ... finally! Little Ellis was born after giving his mommy quite the fit apparently. She went into labor at 1:00 a.m. on Sunday and he was delivered by emergency c-section Monday afternoon, at 1:30 p.m. I really am surprised that they allowed her labor to go on that long, but maybe her water didn't break until Sunday afternoon. Both are doing well and will likely be going home from the hospital on Friday. Yay, Beth ... you finally have your little one to snuggle and love.

Since I have been slacking in the picture posting lately, here are a few pictures of Monkey ...























Isn't she just the most adorable little creature on earth? I can't get enough of her.

Bad blogger

When I started this thing, my intention was to do daily postings with a musing or two and, of course, updates on Sage. I have NOT held up my end of the bargain and hope to make a renewed effort tonight. My plan is to try to post every night after the little monkey falls asleep ... which could be anywhere from 8:00 - 10:00 pm. Like everything else in my life, I'll take care of it around her life and her needs. So, I promise, I will be more diligent in my posting and musings. I have seen other blogs in the last couple of days that makes me feel very inferior in the effort I have made.

I do wonder when those people sleep. Maybe it's a sign that I'm getting older ... maybe it's motherhood and my bodies natural instinct to get more rest to enable me to care for Sage better, but I've got to tell you ... I always crave sleep. I used to crave normal things; caffeine, nicotine, cheesecake, sex. Sometimes in that order, sometimes not, but they were normal everyday cravings. Now it's SLEEP ... sweet, blissful sleep. Does it ever stop? Do you finally get used to your new routine and living at the whim of a little person, or do you always have this new craving? One that supercedes all other cravings and at times becomes a driving force in your life! It's not like Sage doesn't sleep through the night ... she does. Maybe it's the new waking time of 5:00 a.m., to make sure that I am ready and able to care for her in the morning, that has me so out of whack. I've never been a morning person and always hated waking up. Now, I love waking up and waiting for her to finally open her eyes and grin at me, but I'm so friggin' tired!

Thing is, it wouldn't be all that big of a deal, but I usually feel bad when I go to bed at night. Between having a new baby, Cody's baseball schedule and the occasional running for either PJ or Kaylie, there isn't much time to spend with Pete. He always stays up late and I'm just too tired to stay up with him. I miss the time that we used to spend together, and want more of it, but it's impossible to not climb those stairs, fall into bed and wait for slumber to overtake me in minutes because I know that the alarm is going to go off at that dreaded 5:00 a.m. and I don't want to be too tired to give Sage the attention she needs in the morning before I take her to the babysitter ... whose name is Phyllis by the way. I don't want to be rushed because I didn't get up when I was supposed to. It makes the entire day crappy. Rushed in the morning, late to work which leads to "looks" from my boss, which lead to me getting an attitude (which I don't hide easily) and then my boss gets an attitude and it's just all downhill from there.

And, of course, on those bad days, I just KNOW with every fiber of my being that when I get home I will either have a bad report from Kaylies' teacher or PJ will be up to his "I really do turn my homework in" shannigans when it's clearly obvious that he doesn't because he has a big fat F for the class ... and I just want to go crawl in a hole where I'm not going to get some fabricated story about "well David kicked me, so I hit him" when I have already gotten the entire story from a third party and know that Kaylie was 9 times out of 10 the one to instigate whatever has gotten her into trouble ... or the blank stare, more commonly known as the "deer in headlights" look that I get from PJ whenever I ask him why he's not turning in his homework.

I just don't get it. I love my kids ... and yes, I did say MY kids, they are mine. I didn't give birth to them, but those that did really haven't done much else for them in their lives. Leslie is a better mother than I was led to believe, given the chance to actually be a mom to the boys, but Natalie is no better than the roadkill I tried, unsuccessfully, to avoid getting on my tires this morning. But I am regressing here, which you will notice I do a lot ... again, I just don't get it. My kids are great. They usually have manners (except at the dinner table, when one of the boys will without doubt have a sudden attack of gas) ... they are caring ... they pick at each other like normal siblings ... all normal kid stuff. What I don't get is the lying for no reason other than to lie. That's all I can define it as because they know, without doubt, that one ... I will know they are lying ... and two ... I'm going to blow my top when they do it. So, why do it? I still can't find a reasonable explanation. They don't do it to everyone else! Is it a step-mom test that I am completely failing or haven't learned the lesson of yet? What the hell is up? If anyone knows ... please let me know ... 'cause I swear, I have a lot of soaps in the house and I'm not afraid to use them. I don't want to resort to washing their mouths out with soap, but will if I have to. And to be honest ... I don't see it having any affect other than Kaylie and PJ having extremely clean colons and the possibility that they will be giving bubble displays upon passing gas well into their 30's with their propensity for lying.

Busy week

Well, it was a busy week since Cody had either practice or a game every night. Sage wasn't feeling well yesterday on top of it all. I think it was the green beans she started eating on Thursday. They seem to have given her gas. So, we are starting carrots today and, hopefully, she will do better with those.

She is growing so fast ... and is SO nosy! Half of the time, I can't get her to eat if there is anyone else around. She'll take about 2 ounces of her bottle to take the edge off of her hunger and then she has to look all around and see what everyone is doing. She's also quite interested in the television, unfortunately. She laughs at the people on there and talks to them all of the time.

Here's a picture of her from earlier this week. She was laughing at Cody.















... and eating green beans on Thursday.